Kindness Goes A Long Way

from Art.com

Kindness is a virtue we don't see much of today.  Sad, isn't it??  

Last evening I was having a discussion with a lady whom was upset with her husband of a year.  Now, us wives of any amount of time have been upset with our husbands, and our husbands with us.  That's a given in marriage.  Life happens.  My suggestion to her was to use kindness and gentleness in speaking to her husband, rather than confrontational complaints.  It did not go over well with others listening, and mocking ensued.  I know it's normal in our world, but it is disheartening to see.  

I'll share here what I shared with the lady I mentioned.  You are welcome to disregard if you desire, but I think you may find if you try it, you'll gain more than you expect.

Kindness goes a long ways in a marriage, no matter if it's a day or 50 years.  A heart that pours out kindness to your spouse will be a happy one. 

 There are days your spouse will say hurtful things.  It's part of life, and since we are imperfect, sinful humans, we're going to do that.  But, we can choose how to respond to our spouse's words.  We don't have to bark back and bite off their heads.  We don't have to give silent treatment, snarky remarks, cursing, and so on.  It's a choice we can make.  Our world tells us it's our right to talk back, to hold our own, to put the spouse down as they have done to us.  But, is that right?  

Our choice in kind words to our spouse can bring them around.  Rather than snap back at them when they are upset about something and barking at us, we can choose a gentle reply if one is needed.  We don't have to bite back at them.  We don't have to respond with hateful hurtful speech. We absolutely have control over how we handle situations.  Our words most definitely can make or break our relationship. 

Other things I suggested to this newlywed:  Ask your spouse what he would like for you to do for the day.  Tell him you appreciate what he does to provide for you and/or your family.  Use a gentle voice rather than an angry one.  Don't try to change him--only if he's wearing diapers can you change him, otherwise that is up to God to do.  Give him grace and mercy when he needs it.  

This is something maybe we all as spouses can try out.  I work on this too, it's not necessarily easy, but the rewards are better when I do try.  

What are your thoughts on this?